Summer Abundance

Entry Thrice. If you are someone who "likes" that I'm doing this, tell me what you're excited about or what stands out for you after reading. It helps feed my fuel and it's like having another pair of eyes/ears out here, which is Christmas come early for me.

PEOPLE: I'm making networking connections as abundantly as the mosquitos have been attacking my flesh. There's an amazing couple that I met through Dryden's tiny little farmers market--I went over there to pick up some organic-fed, pastured chickens to find them living off grid in a freakin' Earthship. For those of you who don't know, well, google it. There's is a passive-solar home-built house made from rammed Earthen recycled car tires. It sounds a little ugly when you read about it in words, but this place is GORGEOUS. They have no well--its all rain catchment for home and farm use (however this year thats not saying much because it randomly pours like twice a day!). Anyways if you want to check them out--Tapped Earth Farm on Facebook. There are some sick photos of their property taken with a drone.

One of Tapped Earth's pastured chickens

Also some of my friends through Primitive Pursuits live literally right up my road and are building a straw-bale house soon. I told my Grandpa that the other day... he gave me the funniest look and then made a joke about the big bad wolf. I swear people literally have no idea what I'm talking about half the time anymore.

EARTH MOMMA: She is filling my life with abundance right now. I ask, I wait, I give gratitude, I let it go, and then BAM, She delivers. Seriously my life is flowing in free materials, free help, and free love and appreciation for what I am doing here. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I feel so connected to my purpose. I feel so connected to this place. I have to say though, I really didn't realize how country of a place I grew up in... you drive like 3 minutes South and suddenly every single house has a tractor and a backyard garden, or at least a couple million miles of corn. It makes me feel like there as so many people here I will really git round to liken'.

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WATERS: The rainstorms here are ridiculous. Back in Seattle they don't know what rain is. I swear every time my clothes on the line get just about dry, the Gods laugh and bring in the most crazy downpours you could imagine. Seriously... the moment the rain starts I make a mad dash for my clothes, but by the time they are all off the line and in the basket both the clothes on the line and on my back are soaked through. Washington is not rainy, its misty... prone to continuous dreary sprinkling (though yes the summers make it worth it).

TREES: I've fallen in love with black locust (Robinia pseudoacacia). It grows prolifically across our Southern property line and most landowners hate it because it grows fast, has big ole' thorns, grows more every time you cut it, and doesn't split well for firewood. We are going to abide by one of the principles of permaculture: make problems into solutions, so that I can continue to love it, guilt free. We are going to lay a black locust hedge that will keep in livestock because of the thorns, it will grow quickly and densely enough to re-lay the hedge often and frequently cut it for firewood when it's small enough not to have to split. It is a nitrogen fixer, making the soil better for other plants while simultaneously creating awesome biomass for addition to the compost. It's also a rot-resistant wood that makes great tools and fence posts. PLUS when the wind blows, it dances more beautifully than prom night.

Black locust treeline in the background with peeled saplings
for a raspberry trellis and fence posts to the right.

Lacto-fermented snap peas.

Mmmmm...

PLANTS: Who knew I loved plants so damn much?! I certainly didn't. Turns out, they are NOT boring. They grow so fast! Its unbelievable. I have yet to try it, but I'm pretty sure if you sat for a whole day in the garden you could watch a entire pea take form. I'm already planning my garden for next year and boy get ready, I'm going to have more vegetative currency than people can handle. Seriously though, does anyone want any kale or collards?

BIRDS: Why are sounds so much harder to remember than images? It is so hard for me to learn bird calls so I'm starting simple. I've got the catbird's crazy imitation garbled song down, the nuthatch's nasally yanks, and I'm focusing on the Northern Cardinal now. How many of you can imitate a cardinal right in this moment just from your brain? That's what I'm working on.

ANIMALS: It has become a routine that I wake up in the middle of the night to intensely loud sniffing right next to my tent. The first night I woke up in a dazed panic sure my house was about to be huffed and puffed down. Shortly after the snuffling was a brief silence and then then such a loud, unexpected crunching noise I jumped clear out of my skin. It has now become a most-night ritual that a deer comes and eats fallen apples just on the other side of my tent wall. Sometimes she comes late enough in the morning that I get to watch her long white tail flick and her huge ears satelliting around for potential predators.

SKY: I am already noticing that the morning sun doesn't wake me up so early and it's actually mostly dark when I head off to bed now. The days are getting shorter and I still have SO MUCH TO DO.

BODY: So... I'm the heaviest I've ever been in my whole life and no, unfortunately not because of farmer muscle. Noticed that all my pictures are of food? I didn't until I went to upload them to show you all what I've been up to. On the plus side, every meal I'm making is nearly the best food I've ever eaten in my life and I can't stop. Is it worth getting fat? Well ummm duh.

Spiralized zucchini noodles

Frozen bananas from
Momma Whitmore

Saurkraut batch #1!

INNER TRACKING: Had my first bout of Lyme symptom relapse and it was the most amazingly scary and informative experience I've had to date about the way this disease affects me. Because getting and treating Lyme has been such a slow process for me, it has always been really difficult to tease out my emotions and reality from the way the spirochetes (the ancient Lyme aliens) affect me. I have gone through a lot of emotional swings and depression over the last couple of years, and though I wont give Lyme all the credit for that, listen to this: Coupled with joint pain, headaches, and hit-by-a-truck fatigue, I had the most intense mind chatter and emotional darkness for like two days. I sat in my upstairs bathroom one night silently crying, rocking back and forth, and telling myself I was okay and that all my life dreams weren't over. Seriously, it was so outside of my actual reality here where I wake up at 6am everyday so pumped for life. Wow. So amazing that there are beings in this world with that kind of a super-power.

For my next entry I've decided to compile a video with a bunch of short clip highlights from my life here. Hehehe. I'm excited to show you all.

Settling In

People: First of all, thank you to all those who responded to my first entry about my arrival to this new place and lifelong dream--from liking my post on Facebook to calling me with tears of joy and ecstatic laughter. It meant a lot.

This week I have begun to peel off my hermit shell and reach out to the amazing plethora of awesome people I have access to in my life. Particularly, there is a family I want to share with you all, the Whitmores for those of you that know them. Somehow I am deeply comfortable and have so much love for every single one of them, which is saying something since there are what, 8 of them? I've lost track. Anyways, yesterday I walked around with Father Whitmore, deep in conversation about farming, family, business, and my personal hero, Joel Salatin, who is a deep advocate of the prior. As we walked he showed me scrap materials from his business that he could set aside for me, including a ridiculous little woodchuck that popped up amongst some fence posts. What a blessing... That evening I went over to the house to look at fruit trees, berry bushes, and do some weeding with one of their sons, one of my absolute best friends from highschool. I learned to lacto-ferment beets straight from the garden with Momma Whitmore and then was cooked a superb garden-supplemented meal from another of their sons, who for reference just accepted a job teaching gardening, nutrition, and cooking for an elementary school in Oregon. 

This is just a sliver of the people here that I get to love. 

Earth Momma: Upstate New York is a gorgeous place. Hills that dip and swing, roads up and down to reveal series of big lakes, open stretches of farmland, and wooded hillsides. The drive from my place in Dryden into Ithaca is along this backroad highway that at one point opens up to overlook Cayuga Lake, one of the famous Finger Lakes, with the city of Ithaca smattered on the hillside in the background. It is one of the most breath-taking views I've seen in my wise-many years... haha, but seriously its worth coming out here for that view alone (and then to come visit me, of course). 

Waters: There are more skipping stones in one creek here than in all the rivers combined from Washington. Flat, smooth, slate-colored stones destined to sail across the smoothly-tiered creeks and rivers that run all over this water-loving landscape. Enough said. 

Trees: I've been working with wood a lot this week, mostly designing and building a compost toilet to replace the flush one we have in our downstairs bathroom. For those of you who've never used one, and I'm not talking a pit toilet or a fancy boat-toilet, don't knock it till you try it. If it helps, the only reason my Mom is open to it is that she was forced into using one when she came to visit me in WA, and realized it's actually a very pleasant experience. Now that we are going to be eating food off of our own land, it's especially important that we complete the cycle of those nutrients back onto this land and not just flush them away into the septic system where they then get deposited who knows where. No shocking splash of cold water as your poo hits the bowl, just a sweet aroma of wood chips and a clean conscious.

Cleaning out the barn: one of the many cleaning projects to get ready for an efficient, productive farm experience. 

Plants: The blackcap raspberries are coming out our ears now and every meal is supplemented with kale in some form and a side of snap peas. This weekend I'm getting a visit from one of my best college friends and plant nerd experts that I know, which mind you is probably a lot more than the average American. I'm so excited to walk this land and learn MORE species to eat, make medicine from, and increase my general ecological understanding of this paradisiacal place I'm living. 

Birds: Saw my first predatory bird the other day while sprawled out on my back soaking up the hot sun rays after a playful swim in the pool. I was deep in conversation with another highschool friend about life, Spirit, prayer (you know, surface level stuff), and I probably startled him a bit as I shouted and pointed up at the sky. Wayyyy up high, circling smoothly, was some sort of Buteo hawk--most likely a red tail. Thank you universe for answering my desire. So... now I want to see a cooper's hawk or an eagle, please. (-:

Animals: I got my first tick-bite. Found the little bugger on the inside of my left ankle. I pulled it off and taped it up on a piece of paper with the date, time, and location found and then titled the paper "Universal Reminders." Haha, perhaps that joke only makes sense to me, but honestly the tick has become one of my greatest allies. Getting lyme disease and spending the last 8 months under extreme lifestyle reconstruction and heavy antibiotic treatment has given me more gifts than I could explain on this blog. Ticks are now my reminder to be grateful for my health, to treat my body with love and respect, and look at and acknowledge my emotions from an outside perspective. Thank you ticks. Thank you lyme disease. 

Sky/weather: Well the universe is giving me an easy transition from the Washington dampness. It's been raining here and cloudy pretty consistently, and living in a tent has created a bed of damp comforters and sheets--the only blanket that still feels warm to the touch is my trusty wool and rabbit-fur throw. Come on sun! What chu got??

"Be more, need less."

Body: Can a person wear overalls too much?

Inner tracking: Still in love with this life. Cried again yesterday on the ride home from the Whitmore's at the sheer beauty and connectedness of the life I'm living. Sometimes though, I wish I had someone to bask in it with. I mean, yes, I have my parents and my friends, and they are happy to see me so happy... but some nights I really look forward to the day I'm ready to open my heart up again and share the absurd amount of love and joy that is spewing from the cracks of my being. All in good time... I'm happy that this is a journey I'm starting on my own... as my own lover. It feels really good to love myself this deeply and honestly. Thank you for letting me share that openly with you all. It takes an army of support to believe that so fully.

Much love, 

Estelle

My Arrival Home

Six years ago I left my childhood home in 

Dryden, NY to embark on my journey into adulthood—step one: college.

Four years ago I postponed my bachelors in Conservation Biology to embark on a 

journey across country to the Snoqualmie Valley, near Seattle, Washington. There I would take a 9-month course focused on wilderness survival and nature education.

Three years ago I quit college for good and moved back to Washington as a fulltime farmhand and became obsessed with sustainable agriculture and permaculture.

One year ago I left my farm job to become an apprentice at the Wilderness Awareness 

School Anake Leadership Program. There I would further my education as a nature mentor and grow in my understanding of the 8-shields model on which the school is built.

And then,

one week ago 

I left all my friends, 

colleges and mentors 

and landed back 

in my little hometown 

in Dryden, NY… 

for good.

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            My vision for my life moving forward is to create an educational, 8-shields, permaculture homestead here on the 5-acre plot where I grew up.

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            Woah... That’s a lot of mystery packed into one sentence—and believe me I want to spill it all! I want you to be intrigued and to ask a million questions and to play devil’s advocate and to support me and to cheer me on. But for now, I would like to share just a little bit from my first week back here on this beautiful piece of land.

People: Right now my Dad is my best friend. He is a retired engineer who is as wild and enthusiastic about projects as I am. In the week that I have been here we have worked on remodeling the bathroom, kitchen, office, barn, and cellar. We have weeded, planted, harvested, cooked and made each other laugh…a lot.

            I am feeling like a hermit already, not really wanting to hang out with anyone or go anywhere. I’m that friend who just got into a new relationship and now you never hear from them. I am so grateful for all the people in my life, I know you are thinking of me with love. And for the record, you will hear from me… eventually.

Earth Mother: She is my new lover. I wake up early and walk around the dew-soaked grass as the sun is just starting to warm the crisp night air. I sit under a gigantic maple tree or an old black cherry tree and I smile, or sometimes I cry—both with absolute overpowering joy and gratitude. I sit spot every morning and each evening I journal (using this same format). Thank you Universe for hearing my prayers and loving me as deeply as I love you.

Waters: So… my parents have both a pool and a Jacuzzi. I know, I know, I would be jealous too. On hot mornings I jump naked into the pool first thing and am instantly blissfully high on life and very alive. On cold mornings I soak in the warmth of the Jacuzzi and listen to the Cat Birds alarm as our cat Grady hunts birdseed-stealing chipmunks.

            Our land has a beautiful swamp, a natural spring that comes out of the hillside, and an artesian well that pulls up delicious mineral-rich water for us to drink and bathe in. My last name—Waterman—feels more appropriate than ever, as it has been so transformative for me throughout my life, but especially this last week. I am grateful for the water’s capacity to bring me to the present, to shift my consciousness, and to nourish me in more ways than I can count.

Trees: My bedroom is a tent underneath a grove of old apple trees. In the night I hear crabapples dropping from high branches, sometimes hitting my tent and bringing me out of my peeper-frog-lullabied slumber.

The forests in Washington are incredible, they forever have a place in my heart and I miss them. But, there is something wonderful about the hardwood forests of the Northeast: maples, locusts, ash, cherry, hophornbean, and the list goes on. I have begun masterlists for all the species I can identify on this property, trees, but also plants, birds, and animals. It’s comforting how many species I can identify still and exciting how many are new.

Plants: Kale, collards, chard, peas, black-capped raspberries, currents, lettuce, asparagus, mushrooms, nettle (the nettle is only just about to flower here!), sorrel, beet greens… the garden is really starting to produce, and I am really starting to cook. I have never felt so inspired to make food. I have never felt so in control of what I put into my body. I am cooking almost all lunches and dinners for my family, from stuffed mushrooms, to veggie scrambles, to anything and everything paleo. I am grateful for the abundance and availability of healthy food here.

Birds: I haven’t seen any predatory birds yet, which I am surprised by. The songbirds are crazy active though. We have a feeder right outside of our kitchen window that hosts nuthatches, chickadees, purple finches, sparrows, catbirds, feebies, robins, and my favorite—cardinals. The male cardinals are the most vibrant red color you ever did see in nature. I find myself excited for winter when they are back-dropped by bright white snow cover. I thank the birds for bringing me joy and lightheartedness with their songs, and I set intentions to see some aerial predators!

Animals: Besides our two Boston Terriers who snore, fart, bark, and are generally gross, I haven’t seen a lot of mammal activity yet. There are a lot of deer trails, especially in our back woods, but I’ve only seen one large doe so far. She was back in our South field one morning at first light when I went out to pick wild strawberries for breakfast. I’ve seen a rabbit and squirrels and chipmunks, but I know that there are tons of foxes, weasels, coyotes and even black bear.

            You know my favorite animal sighting? The first night I was walking back to my tent and saw this blinking light out in the middle of one of our fields. Honestly my first thought was “A flashlight?” Haha, you guessed it, fireflies. Thousands of fireflies every night that dot the yard and the trees and fields—a moving starry night right at my fingertips.

Weather and Sky: It was hot and delicious for the first few days, so I worked outside a lot… I mean a lot. Eventually I had to stop because the absurd amount of weeding I was doing rendered my hands out of commission for a while. The second half of this week the rain and thunder hit us from Chicago. Yes, thunder storms. I know New York can do better than that for those of you who have lived out here for a while, but to a thunder-starved-Washingtonight, it was perfect.

Body: I’ve been off antibiotics for Lyme disease for over a month now and I feel EXTRAORDINARY. I think perhaps I have undergone some freak transformation because I’m pretty sure I’m some kind of superhero now. I wake up no later than 6am every morning and go to bed after 11pm most nights. I have so much energy and capacity to create. I’ve been stretching and doing animal forms everyday, though perhaps this work is finally starting to catch up with me, because I am soreeeee—I mean fantastically so.

Inner Tracking: Oh boy people, if you couldn’t already tell, I’m fucking happy. Excuse the language but nothing else fits. I am fucking happy. I am my own partner, my own love. I could say so much. I’m learning so much about myself everyday, but for now I’ll leave it at that.

Thank you for being a part of my journey.

Much love,

Estelle